you’ll be loved Like you never have known The memories of me Will seem more like bad dreams

There was a time when everyone said it would be OK and things would get better and I said it wouldn’t be OK, IT would get better but life would not be OK, maybe there was a chance in 5 years. Well a part of me wanted to believe them but so far they are wrong and it all feels the same as I new it would!

Where is this going?

It has come apparent to me now beyond all questioning that life just goes downhill. started slowly at 23 and began to pick up pace by 24 now at 25 there is basically nothing left, most people i knew have moved on and have other stuff to do. I don’t no what i did wrong to end up in this situation I just thought there would always be people about and I would always have something going on, how did they avoid becoming me? I suppose eventually you are just left with your job and your loneliness. Everyone talks about oh its hard to get a job a good career after uni, anyone can do that if they try, no one warned me that when you get to 25 you will have no friends because they will all have better stuff to do and you’ll have no options because you’ve tried everything to meet new people and stimulate your life 

Change

I’m going to give up, going out, except in Ampthill or specific gig/events in London. I’m also going to try and not get so incredibly drunk and dance like a complete maniac as its just got so old and I’ve been doing it forever! I want to do something different when drunk! I’m going to lose weight! my other aim is to go camping at weekends! I would say do something about my god awful hair but I don’t think anything can be done

Back to the place I belong